Journal Reflection

This semester I faced a few challenges while writing my blogs/journal entries. There would definitely be nights where I didn't know what to write about so I just came up with something random and talked about it for a bit. Then there were the nights where I was afraid I was writing something too personal, but I realized I can't entirely be judged based on what I talk about. I'm a very unique individual and I've accepted myself for who I am. I do the strangest things at times and no one, not even I, understand why. Over time I've become more comfortable with myself and who I'm coming to be. I had some rough edges growing up, but they're finally round out to be quite nice. I used to be the sad, depressed girl who just moped all the time. Not anymore though. I've realized how much I've missed in my life from being afraid. Afraid to love someone, afraid to give and care, afraid to even congratulate myself on a victory. All the wonderful things that could happen and the happiness that can be shared from one to another. I'm pretty open minded about most things, but I do still have my moments where I'm very difficult and refuse. I have the best family and friends I could ever have and I'm thankful for them everyday. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of someone and how lucky I feel to know them and have them in my life. I've taken lots of things for granted as I've mentioned before, but I'm going to keep on this path I'm walking on and keep my head held high and thank God for everything he's given me since day one. This journal keeping has actually been good therapy for me and its been nice to just let things go every night. =)

Last Entry for the Semester

Well it seems this will be my last entry for my college class. This doesn't mean I won't be using this account anymore though. I just won't be writing in it everyday like I have been. I may from time to time choose to write something that's either on my mind or I have an opinion about. Who knows what will happen, but I do know I liked this exercise for my course and it was something I was actually excited to do. So what do I have to say for my last entry? Well, lets see. I've learned a lot over the past several weeks, had good experiences and some bad. Thats not too far out of the norm though. Met and gained great acquaintances and friends. Given the fact that I pretty much knew no one when I decided to come to OTC. I'm almost satisfied with how things are. Providing I pass these 2 classes I'm uber scared about. And the sad part is that I HAVE to pass them. It's not a eh, whatever...let it roll of my back. I certainly need to pass these classes so I can continue on. If something tries to hold me back I'm bound to stress out tremendously. And its not entirely just school, its anything. Friends, family, myself. There isn't a particular thing that I won't stress over. School just happens to be the main one right now at this time. Aside from money, which I have a huge lack of. I can't get a job that will work around my schedule it seems so I'm bumming off my parents and grandfather. Which I absolutely hate. I don't like asking for money. Hell, I don't like asking for anything to be honest. I just want someone to hire me part time so I can afford stuff for myself...seriously...its getting ridiculous.

No One Listens

I have yet to discover why my friends get into the situations they seem to stumble upon. It baffles me. When they know they shouldn't be involved or shouldn't be caught up in any mess they do it anyway. I love my friends, but I try to tell them that what is going on isn't probably the right thing, but they don't seem to listen and end up finding out in the end that I was right. Its those "hate to say I told you so" moments that happen often. I try to voice my opinion so they know what I think, which is usually almost right in most cases. Not always, but I have a tendency to know what people are thinking and what their plans or intentions are. I'm not saying I haven't had my share of dumb decisions where I got caught up in a guy or whoever. We all have, I know, but I've just realized sooner than most how things work and what will most likely happen or potentially happen. I may still get tangled up in someone later down the line who isn't good for me, but I will respect the words of my friends and take their words into consideration when I may think something isn't right. Although right now I'm hoping to bypass any more guys and the shenanigans that comes with it. I'm so done with all the head games and the stupidity that comes with getting to know someone. I just want to like someone and they like me back...no more foolishness. Get to the point and make something happen. Thats what I want. I'm not being difficult, I promise. Hell, I don't even ask for much. I'm simple, yet complex. Only time I'm complex is when it comes to decision making for shoes or math. I make it seem like its rocket science when its truly not. Makes no sense.

Politics

I've never been one to fully understand politics nor even care for them to be honest. And I know so many others that feel the same, but today I had to type up a 3-page paper for my government class. So I basically had to research information on various topics of somewhat interest to me. Of course I wasn't going to find anything that was THAT exciting to me, but I found enough to intrigue me and actually give me something to talk about for a paper. Which is surprising. I've seriously never been one to engage in political conversations. I was the person who walked away when it got brought up. I never knew what was going on in Washington and I didn't really care, so I just did something else when friends would be discussing some issue. Now, though I see how important it is for me to be informed of the issues and ideas that are being brought up in the White House. Myself and the people of the United States have the right to voice our opinions when we feel its necessary. We've been given that right and most of us don't use it except in negative ways that don't benefit anyone. I always said, I have freedom of speech so I can say what I want. Which is true, but sometimes you need to use those rights for the good of the people and not just because "you can". I'm realizing more and more everyday that I'm getting older and that I've got to make some changes in things I do and say. I'm not a bad person and I'm quite mature for my age. I always have been. I just know now that things are becoming different with our society and as we evolve. Things change everyday and you must change too.

Jessica Phillips

I just found out today, literally about an hour ago, that a girl I somewhat know, died yesterday. I didn't believe it. A guy in one of my classes today mentioned something about a girl from the Neosho area dying lastnight and I didn't know what he was talking about. So I came home today and I did a little research and I couldn't find anything that said something about a girl. Then I was about to give up searching when I finally stumbled upon an article that mentioned a girl in a wreck. Low and behold, the name was Jessica Phillips, 19. That's her. But then I second guessed myself and thought, no...that could be a different Jessica. It sounds like a common name. I remembered we were friends on Myspace so I decided then to check her page to see when she signed in last and her comments - to see if anything seemed weird. I checked the date, she signed in on the 20th. Seems about right since today is the 22nd. She was always on, so I know she's on everyday. She can't go 2 days and not sign in, thats not right. So I scrolled down and then that was when I knew, there were people saying they couldn't believe what had happened, and it didn't seem right, she couldn't be gone. Everything you could likely imagine. I sat in shock for a brief moment taking it all in. I didn't know what to think. I'd just seen the girl a few months ago in Joplin. She knew me and vice versa. How does something like this happen...I don't understand. She was only 19, her life wasn't supposed to be over yet, it was only just beginning. I guess God had different plans for her. I know she's in a better place now. May God rest her soul.

RIP Jessica Phillips

Shine on in Heaven girl!

Life and Baseball?

If its one thing I know...its that life throws you curves. And I've truly experienced that. Over the years I've had several, upon several, swing and miss moments. I may even have had a couple home runs, or so I thought they would be. Just when I think I might make it back to home plate, safe...I'm out. So then I walk back to the dug out with my head hung low and I'm covered in dirt. That's how my life pretty much ends up - frequently. When I think things are going great and wonderful, here comes something out of left field and totally screws it all up. It leaves me feeling useless. So then I have to ponder on what went wrong and why. Its a good way to mess up a girls day, I'm telling ya. Its a crazy way to compare my life to baseball, but its so fitting. Most comparisons can work out that way for some reason. For example, I've told guys that having me is like a game of baseball. They can have 3 strikes and then they're out. (Of course depending on what the "strike out" is) they might just get kicked out of the game. Cause a ruckus and "you're 'outta here!" I don't ask for much, in fact I don't ask for anything. I'm not demanding nor do I tell anyone what to do. I'm pretty sure I'd be the best girl ever, but I have yet to find a guy who realizes this and appreciates that. Granted, I'm not going to be walked all over because I know better than that - I've learned over time. I have a backbone and I'm not scared to enforce it. By the way I make it all sound, I'm thinking I should call myself an Umpire...hmm...just maybe.

Curls

I found a way to curl my hair like I want it, finally! And its the most simple way. Who would've thought. And with my amount of hair thats amazing. It doesn't take me long at all, yes! The effect I wanted was some messy, beachy looking curls. And I'm so ecstatic that I've discovered the technique. Brianna made fun of me earlier cause I went with her to the craft store and she asked if it was "done". I said, well, yea...and she just looked at me weird then started picking up pieces analyzing them, trying to figure out what in the hell I did. Perhaps it doesn't look the greatest for my first attempt, but atleast I've finally figured it out and the more I do it, the better I will get! Anyway, when Brianna called me asking to go to the craft store with her I knew what she was going for...flowers, tulle, ribbon, hair clips, etc etc. She's been wanting to make hair pieces to wear to work. Which is a very cute idea, for sure. Using roses, sunflowers, mums, whatever you could probably imagine in an array of colors just to put on her head. I think I just want to glue a little bow on a bobby pin and call it a day. I'm not much into the idea of dressing your head all up with random items. Unless my hair is up of course. I can have a hay day with that. I think I will just make an abundance of bobby pins with bows on them and wear them from time to time with outfits. That sounds like a spectacular plan. I shall go with that idea! On that note, if anyone would like to know how to make the beachy, messy curls, let me know, I'd be more than happy to describe it for you so you can do it too! =)

My Friend's Friends

Lastnight I was out with my friend Brianna, as usual, and she mentioned that she wanted to go to some get together where some friends from her high school days were. I agreed to go, although if I try to get her to go with me somewhere she absolutely refuses. Lame. Anyway, her, Alyssa and I meet up with her friends at their apartment. I'm just glad I'm a social butterfly otherwise every moment of my life would be so awkward. We end up going to a bowling alley and hang out there. I didn't bowl, nor did Alyssa. As we're all hanging out and whatnot. I get the vibe that Briannas friend has some attraction for me. I mean, you can usually tell if someone seems to be intrigued by you. As the night goes on, he comes across more and more into me. Don't get me wrong, he's a decent looking guy and he seems nice. I'm only interested in one guy right now. I don't care about getting to know anyone else. I'm not dating the other guy or anything, but I really want it to come to that and more in the end. Its what I'm hoping for anyway. Finally, 4am rolls around, and we need to get to bed. Its been a long night and Alyssa had been up over 24 hours by the point. We head out the door and I'm walking down the stairs and Chris yells my name and wants me to come back up really quick. I don't know why, but Alyssa was having none of that. She's like my mother sometimes. So she told him no, we're leaving, going home and going to bed haha. My night was actually quite random, but I did have fun though.

Missing Them

I know I've mentioned before that I don't care about my friends I had in high school. Whats done is done and its over with. Well, I've had a change of heart and I've honestly decided that I do in fact miss my friends and peers from high school. Not entirely everyone, but several. I was sitting here thinking about Chelsey, she was my bestfriend from Kindergarten til Senior year. After we graduated we basically stopped hanging out and talking altogether. We went from spending countless hours together hanging out, being typical girls to everything coming to a complete hault. It was almost depressing for awhile and I tried to contact her and stay in reach with her, but I realized our lives were going different directions. Her parents had these heightened expectations of her and mine just wanted me to do what made me happy. Turns out she sort of let them down by transfering from Mizzou to Missouri Southern, but she wanted to be closer to her boyfriend. Whatever though. I figured if she was happier here with him then so be it. But that still didn't change anything. She was back, but I still never saw her. She was always with Casey, her boyfriend. And he pretty much keeps her at bay. Or atleast thats what I got from it. A few months back I saw her and him at Walmart in my hometown of Neosho. It was almost shocking. We hadn't seen eachother in years! During our nearly 30 minute conversation, she mentioned that her and Casey were moving to Fayetteville. I don't know what it is about Fayetteville, but it seems everyone I know is moving there or something. I don't know whats going on. Whats so special about Arkansas anyway? I mean really...

Stress

I'm about to stress out, overly. There is so much going on right now with my classes that I'm about to freak. I know I have one month left, but seriously...why all the work! Come on now, we're only human. I'm not complaining about all my classes, just a couple. But those couple of classes are killing me and I'm trying to balance it all out. Perhaps I should pick up Tai Chi or some other form of relaxation. Perhaps Yoga. Who knows. Either way, I need to do something before I end up having several gray hairs on my head. Hell, I'm surprised I don't have any now. I get stressed easily over little things and its usually over nothing that matters or something that will work itself out in the end, which is the really dumb part. Like planning my classes for fall semester, yea, I'm stressing over that and its nothing to be worried about. I always get it in my head that I'm not going to achieve what I want and I'm going to fail drastically. Which is never the case. I freaked out over everything possible in cosmetology school. I thought I was going to brutally cut someones hair, I thought I wasn't going to graduate on time, and I thought I'd fail my state boards. I passed all that with flying colors. I lack the faith in myself a lot and thats bad. I know I'm good at things I do, I just need to believe in myself and trust that everything will work out in the end. As they say, "Everythings ok in the end, if its not, then its not the end", or something like that. I had never truly embraced what that actually meant until recently and I totally agree, finally.

You Try to Tell Her

I tried to be a good friend and give my honest opinion about her situation and I think I may have slightly offended her. Its like I said though, you ask and you shall receive. I just can seem to muster why she would rid herself of a decent guy who she said was so sweet to her and everything for some d-bag she apparently hates and can't stand to talk to. I realize we women are programmed weird to liking the jerks, but seriously, if you know you hate the guy why worry about trying to have something with him? There's a difference between a guy who was nice to you in the beginning to a guy who was just rude from the get-go. Poor girl doesn't stand a chance. I don't know what his intentions are, but he turns 21 tomorrow and he wants her to go out with him for his birthday. In my mind, he just didn't want to be alone for his birthday and he also of course got a haircut from her as well. I think he's just keeping her around for things he can benefit from. And I don't want her to get hurt. She says she kind of likes him, even though he's the most rude and egotistical guy she's ever met. That makes no sense to me. I can't stand a guy who is full of himself and treats others like crap. I will stand up for myself and say what I think. And if the guy doesn't like it then so be it. He's not worth my time and I move on. I've had my fair share of self absorbed losers and they of course have bit the dust. I can't stand to be around someone who cares about his looks more than I do. And trust me, I'm pretty insecure sometimes so I freak out about how I look a lot. Maybe I'm just reading into her situation a little too much. I don't know, I'm not there to see whats going on so I can't make too many calls on it.

Not Interested

I can honestly say I'm not interested in any other guys right now. I only have one certain guy I've put my focus on right now and I really want it to happen and work out for good this time. Of course my luck doesn't always pan out like I'd want it to so I won't "count my chickens before they're hatched" as they say. He's not the type I usually go for which blows my mind beyond words, but I've always had this unspoken attraction to him. And trust me, you don't want to know how long its been, its almost pathetic. I've dated other guys and whatnot, but there is something that just always feels so right when I'm with him. I can be myself - as goofy, weird and completely ridiculous as I want around him and I don't care. He accepts me no matter how I am. He laughs at things I say because sometimes they don't come out right and I love to hear him laugh. It makes me so happy to know that when he does laugh its genuine and not fake. And whats really funny is that I've always had this problem of proving myself to a guy that I'm the best thing out there. I do, in most cases, end up snagging the guy, but thats not how its supposed to be. The guy should like me for who I am, not who I try to be. I've had boyfriends in the past who just like showing me off to the world, as I've said before, but its not like that with him. We're just like two kids having a great time making jokes and being silly. Thats the way it should be. I've never felt such happiness than when I'm with him. I hope this feeling never fades.

Overbearing

These feelings have overcome me with such joy. I don't know if I can control what I have inside. My mind has me wishing on things that may never be, but I keep holding on to hope of what should be. No matter what I do, everything I feel always comes back to you. For years I'd ignored what I thought was a phase that would soon die over time, but the phase has only come back into my heart to be real. What I feel within me is real. You may not truly show what you have for me right now, but I can only be optimistic about my dreams for that one day you will admit everything is mutual and that you can't deny it anymore. I know deep down there is something that keeps us coming back again, but I'm not sure why that is. I want to believe its some sort of sign and that its only meant to be, but I can't know for sure until I see that light in your eyes that tells me the truth. Its right then that you can no longer deny that what I've been saying all this time is crazy. I have a fairytale like imagination when it comes to us and how I believe it will all end. I've been down the road of sadness far too many times thinking I've stumbled upon something great only to be let down yet again. With you though, its never been that way. You bring out a certain shine in me that I can never seem to find with anyone else. You've never judged me nor put me down for who I am and who I've come to be. I honestly believe what we have is rare and beautiful and I want to treasure it forever and always with you. I only hope that this overbearing feeling I get when I'm with you isn't an illusion thats all in my mind and that one day you will see what I see.

A Passion of Mine

Over time I've discovered that I'm very passionate about a few things. My family is one of them. They mean the world to me and if I could, I would do everything in my power to make it all right and give them everything they need and/or want. Of course life doesn't pan out that way and we aren't that lucky. I feel so lucky to have parents that are always there to lend a hand and offer help whenever needed. My brothers are also a good example of this as well. Even if we don't see eye to eye most of the time, there is still a unspoken acknowledgement. Sometimes their devotion and strength goes unnoticed and under appreciated, but I try to let my family know that I do love them and I'm very thankful for everything thats been done for me, along with whatever else that will be done for me in the future. I know it will never stop and thats a great feeling. Just to know someone will always be there for me no matter what.

I'm also very passionate about music. It plays a big part in my life. Although I've given up on trying to play an instrument, I can relate to all kinds of music no matter what my mood is. I know I'm not the only one who feels this way, everyone does. Its a universal feeling we all get when we hear a certain song and it completely fits your current mood or situation. We've all been there. Some of us have the ability to express ourselves with writing a song along with playing music to go with it. I'm not that fortunate; however, I'm not so musically inclined like several individuals I know, but I did try at one time. I will just stick to listening to music instead of completely butchering a musical piece that was once beautiful.

Easter

Happy Easter everyone. Hope it was good. Likely better than mine. I cried at dinner, but its cool. No biggie, things happen. Not saying I had the worst Easter ever, because I'm sure there is someone out there who had the worst Easter of their lives. I just didn't have a good one because my family likes to cut me down sometimes and makes me feel terrible. I'm very sensitive and I take a lot of things to heart. I've always been that way. I do expect an apology when someone hurts my feelings too. So just because you didn't mean to offend or upset me, doesn't mean you get off the hook for making me cry and whatnot. You are sort of obligated to say sorry to someone if you've upset them. Sorry, I don't make the rules haha. Anyway, as we're seated at dinner, I'm getting cut down to size and feeling like a huge sack of crap, its awesome...my mom finally notices that I'm crying and apologizes. After that I no longer had an appetite to eat anything. Once our food arrived we ate and whatnot. I was the last one to finish my food, which is the weirdest thing ever. Even my family commented on it. I'm almost always the 2nd one done, behind my brother. Just a little bit ago we got some cake and I tried to eat a small piece, but its kinda rich, I ate about half of the piece...so much for that. I never eat that many sweets anyway, so it just wasn't in the cards for me I guess ha. And of course my mom bought me some Easter candy, she never goes without buying that every year and I love it. So that is pretty much my Easter in a nutshell, not very exciting I know.

High School Friends and Acquaintances

Lastnight, as I mentioned, I decided to accompany from former good friends of mine in Neosho to a small show of a couple guys I know from high school. They were playing some music at a small place in Joplin and it was pretty good, I've gotta admit. I'd definitely listen to them again. Not only because I know them, but because I truly did thoroughly enjoy the tunes. Need I mention I haven't seen any of these people in years, well except Danny. I saw him a few weeks ago. Either way, its weird trying to get back to where things were. Although, Casey and I just sorta picked up where we left off, kinda crazy. Its kind of like nothing happened. Later around 11 something we decided to go back down to a little bar in downtown Neosho. I'd never been and I always wanted to check it out, so here was my chance, finally. Once I entered, the next thing I know, I look and I see all these people from my high school...whom, I graduated with. Now, I don't visit anyone in Neosho. I've been basically m.i.a. for almost 3 years. Sooo, what I kept hearing was, "KAYLA WELCH! Where have you been?!", "I haven't seen you in years!", "You look exactly the same!", etc. And these people were drunk, go figure. So the questions would repeat of course. I will admit though, it was actually pretty cool seeing them. They've changed a lot, I've changed a lot. I don't drink very often and they all seem to drink a hefty amount these days. It used to be the other way around. Now, I'm not hating on them or anything. We're legal now so its not as risky...unless you go driving of course, but I was the one who drank more often in high school. I got it out of my system then and now I rarely drink. I hate getting drunk and whatnot. Only been drunk 2 maybe 3 times so I can tell you its definitely not my style.

Free Drinks

The name "Free Drinks" is enticing isn't it? Well, don't let the title fool you, its definitely not the name of a special they have going on at the bar tonight, its the name of a guy duo I know from high school. They're 25 now and they've been playing acoustic shows together around the Joplin area as of late apparently. They are pretty good. When I first heard of them through Danny, I got deceived and I thought, what! Free drinks?! Count me in, but to no avail he meant the group. So I felt dumb after that. Either way, I did have a couple drinks and I didn't have to pay for them either, Danny did. So in a sense I did get, "free drinks", but not so free, for him. Anyway, they played quite a few songs tonight and it was entertaining, I will give them that. Brent even remembered me. I didn't know if he would or not. I kept getting that, "I know you" stare until finally he said, "I know you". And I told him yes. Then he stared a bit longer and finally said, "Kayla?" Yep, indeed you are correct. Apparently he doesn't remember names well, he can remember faces, but not names. I don't know how I lucked out being I've only hung out with him a couple times ever in my life. I guess I just have that much of an impact. Only kidding. I have an unforgettable face I'm coming to realize. And it kind of freaks me out sometimes. Places I go to I always get remembered. I never thought I was that different? I guess I am. I'm not really sure, but either way its sort of cool I suppose. Perhaps I will see one of their shows again...and actually buy a shirt this time!

Our Beloved Rocky

I was talking with my mother earlier this afternoon. I called her to see what was going on for Easter. I didn't know if my family was coming up here or if I was to drive down to Neosho. Turns out I'm prob driving down to Neosho for Easter. All while in the midst of our conversation my mom tells me she has some bad news. And I proceeded to ask her what it was, figured it had to do with my brother quite honestly, but she said Rocky had died. I didn't believe her! Apparently it happened Monday. And I talked to her Monday and she didn't tell me! I was at Briannas though and I guess she didn't want to bring me down while I was at her place. I was in utter shock and I didn't know what to believe. Our Rocky died! He was a sweet, beautiful Green Winged Macaw. Weird thing is that he wasn't that old. Maybe around 9 years old. And Macaws are supposed to live for years and years! Its so strange, but I guess he wasn't feeling well and he dehydrated himself along with starvation. My parents didn't notice anything strange until my dad mentioned something to my mom about him acting weird when he was trying to feed him Monday night. I'm heart broken to hear this. He was such a good bird. He talked all the time. He even said my name - Kayla. I don't even know what to think. Its so sad, I felt so awful for my parents. They loved that bird. I guess my mom held and kept petting Rocky that evening and he just died in her arms. I can only imagine being there and seeing him suffer like that. But there wasn't anything they could do. They thought about taking him to the vet, but by the time they would've gotten there it would be too late. I just know he's in a better place now.

R.I.P. Rockford, I love you buddy!

Art and Beyond

I wish I was artistic. In a sense I am, I can do art with hair. What I'm talking about is being a true artist with a canvas, paint, and brushes. Hell, even clay or other random objects! I don't have the ability to make such beautiful work. I can draw a bit, some of it comes out decent, but when I try too hard I let myself down, so I try not to have huge expectations of myself. Well, actually I try not to have big expectations in anything I do - which is completely terrible I know, but I'm a major perfectionist and everything has to be done just right and look just right or I won't be satisfied. That's likely the reason I seldom get my hair done. I always get let down and I don't want to offend the person who did it for me, which these days it will be one of my friends, so I say it looks fine, which may not always be the case. I found one person who could do my hair just right and always the way I want it and he's a guy, who never does hair. He only did it as a side project thing. Him and his wife did other jobs to make money. They raised puppies, he built houses, fences, and whatever else, he mowed yards and whatnot. He did all these other things where he could make more money, but still had enough time for me to do my hair on some random day. I'd say he's a jack of all trades. I miss him and his quirky personality, but I will catch up with him again someday. I don't know when that will be, but I'm sure I still have his number somewhere, if not in my phone.

Variation in Music

I have a new appreciation in most music lately. I'm not so strictly rock, metal, and heavy stuff anymore. I've broadened my horizons, if you will. Lately I have gotten into Rihanna, Beyonce, and Katy Perry. So strange for me, I haven't been one to listen to chick music in years! However, I've always been into acoustic and really mellow musical tastes, but as of late I've truly embraced it. I think it has something to do with a certain boy because he plays guitar. Hell he has 3 different ones! But he can sing and play guitar and thats so wonderful to me. I sat and listened to him play two nights in a row, even sat there while he recorded with his friend the first night. I actually enjoyed it to be honest. At first I was afraid I was going to get bored, but just listening to him and watching him made it worth while. Now, I'm not trying to sound creepy, but I'm honestly proud of him. He writes his own music and everything. He's become a really great guy and I'm so glad I know him. The second day I was with him he was editing his recordings and he asked for my help in choosing beats to go behind the guitar. I thought a piano would be a nice addition and he in fact choose the piano to add. I actually felt like he wanted my opinion on what I thought sounded good. It made me feel good and useful. With background instruments or without, he's an amazing artist and no matter what he does or says he will always be successful in my eyes. Could I possibly boast about him more? Geez. Its like I'm in love with the guy or something...hmm, maybe I am?? Wondering minds will be left to ponder...

Hair - I Remember Doing That!

Lastnight Brianna asked me to go her hair today and me, of course being the great friend I am, said I'd do it. I didn't exactly want to do it because I know the favor won't be returned. I asked and she said she'd do it for me, but yeah right. It took a month of asking for a hair cut, that I never got, for her to agree to finally cutting it. I asked my friend Morgan, once and she did it that next day. All I wanna do is actually have some dimension in my hair. I used to color my hair all the time back in the day so its weird having one solid color for so long. Anyway, I pretty much tried to put it off as long as I could today because for one, I had homework to do, and secondly, as I mentioned she won't return the favor. Either way she wouldn't shut up about it till I did it, which is more annoying than anything. I love the girl to death, but when it comes to doing things for me or anyone else it seems she doesn't care to and thats awful. I never ask for much, hell, I bring my own food to her apartment half the time because I don't wanna eat all her food. Anyway, so I did her hair tonight and it turned out pretty freakin good. I still got my skill! She wanted more blonde back in her hair and then redo the bottom portion around her occipital bone. I got distracted a bit so it took me awhile to do, but in the end it turned out well and I'm satisfied. She said she was content with it, but next time wants to do more blonde. I told her I did what she asked and she said no no, its fine, it looks good. Yada-yada. Man...there is just no satisfying some people I swear.

New People...Friends

Earlier this evening, Brianna was contacted by some guy, whom she'd be talking to occasionally online and she wanted me to go with her to meet up with him. I have no desire nor care to go, but since she's my friend I'm willing to go. Now, she never accompanies me or does anything for me in most cases, but I'm nice and I tell her I will go with her. I have no idea who this guy is except what his name is and that he plays arena football. Almost a dead ringer for me in conversation. Anyway, apparently he's at bww with a buddy of his. Isn't that super, blah. Well we go and and chit chat and whatnot. Sure, he and his friend seem nice, but I'm so tired and I know that I have lab at 8am tomorrow I'm not in the mood for excitement right now. I'd rather be sleeping my night away. I didn't mention this to Brianna, but I got the feeling that he really likes talking about himself or something. I'm not really sure. Perhaps it was just that I am hella tired and I don't care what much of anyone had to say. I was busy texting someone I'd rather have a conversation with anyway. He kept talking about injuries and what has happened to him from football or parties and what have you. He even went as far as to say he had 2nd degree burns on his hands and proceeded to show us his hands. There is no evidence of previous fire burns on his palms. I'm a huge skeptic, but what do I honestly know about burns I guess. Either way, the night is over for me and I'm glad. Off to bed I go!

Next Day

Last night ended up being pretty strange. Morgan and I met up and had sushi. We also asked a couple friends if they'd like to go to Artwalk with us. And to my surprise they didn't know what it was. Crazy. But they ended up being down for the idea, which was great. Told ya the more people the merrier or whatever! Her and I eventually made it downtown and parked...after driving around for a good 5-8 minutes. Then we got Indy out and she was excited. It was a whole new area for her to check out and discover. Of course lots and lots of attention from people petting her and whatnot. No worries, she got all the love she could possibly need lastnight. I forget what all you see at Artwalk...its crazy. Lastnight there was a man dressed up at CP30 or whatever. No joke. I tried to get a picture, but I failed miserably. He was being carried by a mob of people to a place called "The Front Porch". I don't really know why. Maybe its some Star Wars related thing? I don't know, never seen any of those movies. And then there was some kid with a huge paper mache head that made weird noises. I didn't quite understand. And of course you had the usual break dancing and fire dancing people. Our friends JC, Alyssa, and Ryne showed up to join us eventually. So we were a pretty good group just hanging out. Alyssa and Ryne ended up having a falling out that evening so things got really weird for a moment after that. We basically ditched Ryne and let him do his own thing. No biggie to Alyssa, she decided she didn't care about the guy at all, ha. Then there was a case of the texts and calls from Ryne trying to figure out where we were and why we left. The guy just didn't get it I don't think.

First Friday Artwalk

Yep, today is of course First Friday Artwalk. I'm trying to go every month now. Guess we'll see how that goes. Just a little bit ago I decided to color my hair cause trust me, it needs it. Only took me maybe an hour for my whole head and believe me, it got everywhere! I tend to be messy when it comes to my hair it seems. Plus the color is dark and rich so it will stain whatever it adheres to. When I go to rinse I had it all over me to I had to jump in the shower of course. I mean I was going to anyway, but now its even more so a reason. I know a couple friends of mine are going to Artwalk tonight. They are driving up here from Joplin and I haven't seen them in a few months so it will be a nice visit. I think I may ask Morgan if she wants to go because she told me her husband is out of town for some archery tournament or something. I may even ask a couple other people if they'd like to go. See what happens with that. I mean the more people you have the more fun right?? I think so. Even if we don't admire that much art we can still just walk around and get some needed exercise. Thats a way I view it anyway. I'm sure Morgan will have Indy, her dog, with her. That dog gets so much attention wherever she goes, its ridiculous. And its funny because everyone thinks she's a Husky, but she's a Shiba Inu. After you say that you get a weird stare because for some reason people have no idea what that is. If you know what an Akita is, then you definitely know what a Shiba is. Its the mini version, if you will. Love that dog though...and who doesn't...?

Problems...Nothing New

I got a phone call today from my mother informing me that I needed to drive down to Neosho to get the Suburban out of a towing place in Joplin. Since the vehicle is in my name I had no choice than to drive down there. Just my luck. Couldn't be on Friday, it just had to be Thursday. Anyway, I arrived to Neosho at 4:15 and we headed up to Joplin. We arrived to the towing place at 4:40-4:45 and it said "closed" on the door. My mom started getting fierce and angry. So she called the guy and told him that I had drove from Springfield today to get the suv out and that I have class tomorrow. God knows I don't wanna drive back up to Springfield for classes and then back down again. That's just ridiculous. So we basically had a 10 minute conversation about what were going to do about this situation. He decided that he was going to call his brother and have him come do it. The guy who owns the place was in Pittsburg, Kansas and he didn't think I was coming today. Hm...right right. After that was settled, we had to go by the atm and get cash since that was the only way we could get the Suburban back. No debit card or check, whatever. So we went and got that. Came back, waited and he finally arrived. My mom got out and walked over to him and I followed her shortly after. The guy stopped dead in his tracks and just stared at me for a few seconds. Kind of an awkward moment. Then as soon as we got inside he proceeded to hit on me. Asking me all sorts of questions, figuring me out pretty much. He's only 27 which isn't too bad I guess. I knew he couldn't be that old by looking at him. To wrap it all up - In the end, he joined my mom and I for dinner and he didn't want me to leave to go home that night. He wanted to hang out for what seemed like forever. Don't get me wrong, he seems like a nice guy, but I have other priorities in my life right now. =)

Cyrus

Brianna and I were just hanging out like usual when she got the idea that she wanted to wash her dog. I was up for it even though I didn't know how it was going to go down. I figured either we're going to be covered in water orrrr we wouldn't be able to get him in the tub for the life of us. We went to McDonalds first since Brianna just had to have cookies. Yea, we're girls, we gotta have our chocolate fix from time to time. Anyway, we get back finally decide to tackle the thought of giving Cyrus a bath. And in the end we pretty much were covered in water, just as I figured. As well as the bathroom floor and the rest of her apartment. And thing is, we weren't done yet. She got out on the deck and tried to dry him off with a towel. After she realized that was useless she brought him back and and he darted around the apartment like an animal on speed! Once we confined him to the bedroom we tried our best to capture him so we could blow dry him in the bathroom. That took about 10 minutes since I'm guessing he thought we were playing with him on the floor, when in fact we were only trying to catch him. We were crawling all over the floor, under the bed...on top of the bed...everywhere. It was almost comical. She finally got him and took him into the bathroom where we started to brush and dry him. He wasn't quite down with that at all. Once we dried him up a bit, Brianna started to shave some of the matted hair off him so that its easier to brush him and whatnot. Poor guy...he didn't know what was going on, but it was for the best. I think he realized we were trying to help him and not harm him. We gave up after about 2.5 hours of his shenanigans, so he still has some mats on his back end, but we at least got rid of some of them. Either way, Cyrus was a pretty good boy. He got a treat!